SUPREEESE!

I only took the pee test because I wanted to know if I had to take tampons to the cabin that day. I'm not sure WHAT I was thinking, doing something like that right before I was leaving to spend almost three days with my girlfriends. Chalk that up to one more reason why I'm a big dummy.

We'd had five years without the hint of an accident. We'd never been irresponsible or even close to it when it came to the possibility of a pregnancy. Plus, we'd both wondered if maybe we couldn't have kids. I mean, most of my friends had accidents and we never had. Maybe our baby makers were broken! Until Mother's Day. And then, I just figured that ONE TIME not being careful in five years doesn't a baby make.

**Pause for laughter from the crowd.**

Once again, Kate is a big dummy.

The first test took 30 seconds to blast me with a "Pregnant." I stared at it and kept waiting for the "NOT" part to appear on the screen. It wasn't happening and to be honest, I sort of felt like the pregnancy test had ripped me off. I was SUPPOSED to have THREE MINUTES to contemplate the universe before I got my answer. I ripped the second test out of it's wrapper and tried again. Lucky me, I was out of pee. "Error" flashed on the screen this time - or a little book of some sort implying error. Error? ERROR???? What.The.Hell.

I took a second to breathe and clear my head and grabbed my keys and drove as fast as I could to the pharmacy. Ice and pregnancy tests. Ice and pregnancy tests. Lots and lots of pregnancy tests.

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Well, sh*t. These tests weren't messing around.

I called Matt at work, trying to keep it together so I didn't scare him.

"So, um, what time are you coming home?"

"Well dear it's 4:00. Probably not leaving for an hour."

"How about you come home now *sniffle*"

"What's wrong?"

"IneedyoutocomehomenowbecauseI'm . . .*sob* . . .um . . . *sob, sob* . . . I'mPREGNANT*sobsobsobsob*"

I couldn't decide how to feel so I was crying. Part of me was FREAKING OUT. Part of me was really excited. Part of me was already mourning the awesome life of dual income, no kids. Honest to goodness, I started mourning the loss of my BMW. Shallow? Absolutely but dangit I LOVE THAT CAR and I know it's gotta go. If my child ever reads this, I hope they appreciate my shallow honesty. I'm a planner. Everything in my life is according to a plan. THIS? Not in the plan until October. ITALY was in the plan. Well, originally Greece but then they went all bankrupt and started rioting and all that good stuff so we moved a little west. Pasta and St. Peter's and The David and Gelato were all in the plan. Cribs and nursery's and car seats were supposed to come after that.

Needless to say he came home right away.

I think Matt was sharing my emotions but he was oh so much calmer. This was expected since it's part of the reason I married him. He was sweet and reassuring and all the things a great husband should be. We sat and talked for a little while and then I had to leave.

Keeping my mouth shut was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I am an open book kind of person. Not sharing a HUGE secret like this was very, very hard for my big mouth. Especially when three of the girls had brand new babies and there was a lot of talk about the misery of pregnancy. I hope none of the girls feel bad when they see this but I? Sort of wanted to shoot myself a few times.

It's been ten days and the news has started to settle. I had to tell my dentist this morning since I was about to be all numbed up. He was very excited for me but told me his wife didn't get excited until about 8-10 weeks with all her pregnancies. It made me feel a little less like a freak.

So far my symptoms include exhaustion and EXHAUSTION. Oh, and I have to pee a lot. I have only been nauseous a couple of times and it's mostly in the car. It's got to be a symptom because I never get car sick, but other than that I have no food or smell aversions, no morning sickness or any of that.

We haven't told anyone yet. My Mom is probably going to die of a heart attack when I tell her. Seriously. I can hear the screaming and fainting now. It feels like EVERYONE knows even though they don't. Since we found out it feels like everyone is asking when we're thinking about having kids. The best lie I can muster is "soon."

My first appointment is tomorrow. My favorite OB in the whole widest world doesn't take my new insurance so I'm on the hunt for a new doctor. I have lots of recommendations but so far the one who does an ultrasound whenever you want one sound the most appealing.

By the way, it's going to be a girl. I don't think I can handle TWO deviations from the life plan this year so I'm just putting that out there in the universe. Again, if this tiny fetus is a boy and reading this someday just know that both my Mom and I always felt like a girl would come first. If I'm wrong, expect some tears and some time getting used to it and then I'll jump into boy mode with all my soul.

If I did the math right the due date is January 24th. Again, not part of the plan because I firmly believe all children should be born AT LEAST two months away from Christmas but apparently God has other ideas. I'd show you my surprised face if I could.

I'm going to try to keep the pregnancy talk to a minimum over at the original Kateastrophe. This will be my place to whine about my stretch marks and my fat face and my aches and pains. I figured it was better this way. I probably won't be sharing names or any intimate details, but I'm still not sure. I might turn this into a private blog eventually but who knows. I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I'm not a very private person.

So, here goes. Let the incubation begin!